Thats it.
Just a question.
How? What steps did I take that put me where I am now? Maybe, what steps didn't I take?
I figure, not going to university was one of them. Not knowing what I wanted to do with my life didn't help.
This puts me, at 27, living a life that I'm not sure that I'm happy with*. I'm also not sure how to fix it.
Stuck sucks.
*I do realise that happy isn't a permanent state, but it being an occasional state would be lovely at the moment. When things that make you unhappy day to day either put you back in therapy or leave you so frustrated that you can't speak because you know if you do you'll either get extremely angry or cry its a pretty sorry state of affairs.
If it's any comfort, I'd have to speak for the majority of us that we've all arrived at this moment a time or two. Not sure how we got here. Not sure if this is what we wanted.
Maybe that's a good thing. The desire for...more, the desire for...better, the desire for...change.
Posted by: Jason | Thursday, May 07, 2009 at 10:42 PM
Jason - Yeah, I think its a good thing. Its just so hard to know where to begin. I'm figuring therapy, although costly will help. I'm massively impatient - I want it all fixed right now and of course, life isn't like that.
Posted by: Beth | Thursday, May 07, 2009 at 10:49 PM
But you're a smartass! And we wouldn't have you any other way! Hugs. x, e
Posted by: ellie | Friday, May 08, 2009 at 12:33 PM
Ellie - Thank you! x
Posted by: Beth | Friday, May 08, 2009 at 07:15 PM
Do you want to go to university now? You totally could! Else, what would make you happy and what path(s) need to be taken to that end?
Posted by: ruby | Thursday, May 14, 2009 at 09:08 PM
Stuck does suck, but it is such a necessary place to be in the process of change. Soon you will reach "sick and tired" and then "fully disgusted". Only then will action and change happen.
It never ceases to amaze me how stuck I can stay in something before I make the active steps toward change.
Here's wishing you less sucky stuckness.
Posted by: Deb | Thursday, May 14, 2009 at 11:56 PM
alternatively you could have spent 4 years at uni, thousands of dollars and still be thinking how the f*ck did i end up here.
Posted by: sid | Friday, May 15, 2009 at 01:22 PM
Ruby - Unfortunately, I have a ridiculously prohibitive amount of debt to deal with so its not an option, and even if it was I have no idea what I'd study anyway. I think I'm just whining.
Deb - I think I'm getting towards fully disguested. Sick and tired came earlier this week and I'm starting to try and make some changes fort he better.
Sid - Welcome! That is an extremely good point. And knowing me, thats exactly what I'd be doing.
Posted by: Beth | Friday, May 15, 2009 at 01:37 PM
It's great to be so aware of this AND be doing something about it. I'm 27 too and I still don't know what I want to do when I grow up.
Posted by: Mia | Friday, May 15, 2009 at 06:25 PM
Mia - At the moment, I'm not really doing a lot about it other than a combination of stressing out and bitching and whining. Hopefully I'll get to a more positive place pretty soon.
Posted by: Beth | Monday, May 18, 2009 at 06:33 AM
Going through pretty much the same kind of crisis.
In my case, I know how and why I've got to this point; my problem/challenge at the moment is to figure out what kind of life I want.
At present, I'm getting through each day by finding small moments of beauty (how New Agey does that sound). Today's was sitting in the garden in the sunshine.
Keep on it honey...you'll find your way.
Promise.
Posted by: Roses | Sunday, May 24, 2009 at 05:45 PM
Roses - I'm definitely trying and it seems to be getting easier. I think!
Posted by: Beth | Sunday, May 24, 2009 at 07:40 PM